Stupid Mouth

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The name is Elaine or Ien or Pssst or Hoy ...or whatever suits you

...from the city of Davao

...26 with fine lines and wrinkles already

...short-haired, two-eyed na! (thanks to constact lenses), right-handed, flat-footed

...wants to be a Buddhist and a United Nations interpreter someday

...confused about life in general

Song for the Moment

Toni and Sam
You Are The One


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Saturday, November 27

Pleasant Day

Ma'am Lisa Santos and Ma'am Grace Ramos went here to give lectures yesterday. Academic lectures, not those that we remember in college. Hehehe... It was really a pleasant day, no sarcasm in that! The day ended with good "byes" and hopes of seeing all of us [UP arki grads in Davao] in the upcoming Homecoming. Ma'am Lisa even said something like,"... so we can be proud that there are UP grads in provinces like Davao who still uphold the high standards of teaching." Charing!

So the whole hulabalu started when Ligs and I went to fetch Lisa and Grace at Mandaya Hotel. Oh, btw, they said I can call them that way because we are now "colleagues." Hahaha... We ate our lunch at Kuya Eds and I can really sense that the whole thing is kinda awkward. I mean they're our teachers not so long ago, then we're suddenly given full-chika-chika access now?! Good thing Lisa has a lot of stories to share. Well, we tried to loosen up a bit when lunch was over.

We went to UP SOM in anda to get ready for the lecture. The attendance was ok, but relatively fewer than Dytoc's and Evang's talk (accdg. to Ligs). I learned a lot from the lectures... typical of their lectures in school. After the lectures, we had some "kodakan" and "reminiscing." We had dinner at Harana and more kwento about professional practice and whatnot. Lisa even shared her kwento about Kuya Uly taking arch 58 under her over and over again, trying to prove something. But of course she didn't mention his name. I just figured it out.

So there. A simple, yet pleasant day with my former teachers. I hope I made them proud in a way... 'coz I sure am proud to be their student!

capt. backfire at 6:42 PM

Friday, November 26

Welga, Picket, Strike, Pag-aalsa

What ever you want to call it... they succeeded in paralyzing the city... well, in Davao at least. I really didn't expect such turn out because Ateneo seldom cancels classes. Not even a union strike can stop everyday schooling. But yesterday was different. I came in my 7:40am class and found only a third of the class were present until more than half of the period. They're present because either they have their own cars or their parents drove them to school. The student affairs first announced not to note attendance and give quizzes for the day because "it's not the students fault not to be in class." Darn! Now I have to cancel my quiz in History. But it's ok. At least I can still lecture about French Renaissance. ...or so I thought. Around 11am, they cancelled classes because... I dunno! Maybe they want us to watch Polar Express?! Sheeesh! So I went to UP Min to attend my other classes. Omg! I've been waiting for a ride for almost 30 minutes now. I can feel more varicose growing in my calves. Goodness! Where are the PUVs??! Thank God for this one apathetic jeepney driver, I was able to reach Mintal. My class in UP was also affected by the strike. My students in the downtown area were not fortunate enough to ride the jeepney of that apathetic driver and so were absent in class. Around 3pm, UP also declared cancellation of classes. Unfortunately, my last class ended around that time, so that was really a useless announcement for me.

Will the PUV sector get anything from that 1-day strike? With all the hassle they put me through yesterday, I hope they'll get something out of it.

capt. backfire at 8:39 AM

Sunday, November 21

Feeling Weird

I woke up really early today. 5:30am to be exact. The chapter has a scheduled coastal clean-up at Brgy. Daliao in Toril. Toril is like an hour away from Ecoland (where I live), that's without traffic... But wait! We don't have traffic here nga pala. hehehe... Anyway, because of too much waiting-for-whoever and im-on-my-way excuses, we came late for the clean-up. The residents have already gone to the baranggay hall for the SWM MOA signing. So, we just posed for documantation pics and do our own little clean-up here and there. It felt weird to do something like this. I really can't say why, but it feels weird.

As if it doesn't get weirder, my sister flew to Manila, leaving me and Ate Lala until God-knows-when. Starting tomorrow, she will be working at El Nido after working almost 3 years in Marco Polo Hotel. For professional growth she says, but I dunno. I mean I honestly think Davao can be boring sometimes. Life here is too simple. But hello!!! She's going to El Nido! Like it's not a city! Like there's no mall or sari-sari store even because it's a private island resort! Like she'll be alone there, with no family! Like can life be less boring there than Davao?! When did professional growth mean getting a simpler life or lifestyle? I know it'll feel weird at home in the coming days. Yesterday I heard myself telling Ate Lala, "O 'wag na tayo mag-away. Tayo na lang andito, mag-aaway pa ba tayo? *Goosebumps*

I watched VCD the whole day. I gotta watch everything I borrowed last week at Video City... para naman hindi sayang ang babayaran kong fine. I watched "Before Sunrise" starring Ethan Hawke and some girl. Something about their conversations made me want to pursue another "project". In the movie, two Viennese guys, who are not professional actors, are starring in a play... just for fun. Again it made me feel weird because i don't have that "just for fun" aspect in my life right now. Yes, I teach and do research and join orgs and blog and all of those seemed fun, but it's more for "professional growth" [as my sister would put it]. I want to act in a play. I want to be a star player of a certain sport. I want to direct a puppet show. I want to get injuries because I dance. And it feels weird to want these things because it makes me think I still don't know what I want in life. Why do I entertain such thoughts, when I know what I should be doing for the next couple years and what I ought to be doing right now? Does that mean, subliminally, I'm not having fun? Aaaaarrrggghhhh! Weird...

capt. backfire at 10:25 PM

Friday, November 19

Blog Addict and Senti Stuff

Yeah, I am... Actually, I've always been. It was just last sem that I decided to hibernate. And now, I can't be contained!! Hehehe... Anyway, I'm in the mood for senti-senti stuff chuvaling... Hayaan nyo na ako. This is my blog anyway. =p

------------------

It was a week before TFA Week 1999. I was taking pictures with my camera. I took Nap's. Then Ferd's. Then Nin's and Naj's. Then the whole group working on the backdrop. It was past midnight. Thanks for the lipovitan, we're still up. Then this song played...

She calls me from the cold
Just when I was low, feeling short of stable
And all that she intends
And all she keeps inside, isn't on the label
She says she's ashamed
And she can take me for a while
And can I be a friend, we'll forget the past
But maybe I'm not able
And I break at the bend
We're here and now, but will we ever be again
'Cause I have found
All that shimmers in this world is sure to fade
Away again
She dreams a champagne dream
Strawberry surprise, pink linen and white paper
Lavender and cream
Fields of butterfliess, reality escapes her
She says that love is for fools that fall behind
And I'm somewhere in between
I never really know
A killer from a savior
'Til I break at the bend
We're here and now, but will we ever be again
'Cause I have found
All that shimmers in this world is sure to fade
Away again
It's too far away for me to hold
It's too far away....
Guess I'll let it go


I ran towards the 5th floor CR. I wept for 30 minutes. When I stepped out, I was a different person. I continued to be that person until last June. I resolved I will be different once more. I hope I won't hear that song again... ever!

Song is entitled "Shimmer," by Fuel.

capt. backfire at 11:03 AM

Thursday, November 18

Anton

Yes, the name still haunts me. Not the same person, just the name.

Last night, we had a UAP general district meeting to plan the activities for the National Architecture Week (Dec. 5 - Dec. 11). James Hardie Philippines sponsored the meeting at Eat Worx (a resto)... Now you know why I keep adding those pounds! Anyway, District D-1 is composed of 5 UAP chapters -- Davao, Mt. Apo, Kadayawan, Cotabato and Socsargen. Being a director of UAP Davao and Adviser of UAPSA-Ateneo, I was invited to attend the meeting. Hmmm, puro tanders na naman kasama ko, I thought.

So there I was. I ate my dinner. Chit-chatted with other officers. I noticed the guy who just came in and sat next to me. Ok lang. Di gaanong tanders. Came in late, but looks professional naman. After getting exposed to different breeds of guys, I have become hard to impress, especially at first meeting. Hay naku, hanggang first impression lang 'to. The meeting started and everyone was introduced to everybody. "Let's welcome the president of Socsargen chapter, Arch. Anton XXXX Jr."

WHAAAAT??!!! Anton na naman!!! Freaky! So, he spoke. He laughed. He shared his opinions. He ate his dinner. Pero bakit ganon?! There's nothing wrong with this guy! Why are all "anton" (that I know of) like that? Hehehe... The meeting ended. I was able to stalk a few info about him, like e-mail and real name... and I guess that's enough. To keep myself sane about the whole coincidence, I just think of the possible flaws of this guy... He's probably married. He lives somewhere in Socsargen, which is 3 hours away from Davao City. He's probably gay (since I have a solid reputation for falling for gay guys). He's probably wearing pustiso since his teeth are so perfect... and other probable turn-offish circumstances.

Oh well, Anton will forever be Anton. And this Anton can also be another Anton. But Anton will only be Anton if I let him be. Will I? Just like what Alan texted, Ikaw lang makakasagot nyan...

capt. backfire at 11:34 AM

Wednesday, November 17

Quotes and Jokes

During ACARE...

LEX: Bakit parang puro gwapo at maganda ang nandito sa UST?
IEN: Baka tinago lang muna nila ang mga panget.


I told Dean Espina about the abovementioned joke...

DEAN ESPINA: Hahahaha....
Ma'am Chona, the acting dean of UST, enters the room
DEAN ESPINA: Chona! Saan nyo tinatago mga panget nyo dito?
Everyone laughs
MA'AM CHONA: Wala kameng panget dito. Application pa lang, hindi na namen tinatanggap ang mga yan.


Every year, I ask my students in my History class the question, " Why do we need to study the History of Architecture?" And here are some of the interesting answers...

ALEXIS: The past is our only window to the future.

MIGUEL: ...to know how to be as great as the past architects, to know more about their lives. (this answer led to the discussion of the role of UP arki students in the history of arki... and believe me, the discussion wasn't that long. hahaha)

JEVI: ...to appreciate and criticize architecture of a particular civilization. (this answer led to the discussion on why history [in arki] is taught per civilization and not in chronological order of world civilizations)

NEL: ...to know what is still yet to be discovered.


In my theory class, I asked them the question, "What is beautiful? When do you consider something or someone beautiful?" Surprisingly, I got thought-provoking answers from my Ateneo students...

MARK: Something is beautiful when its mere existence amazes me or I, myself, know I can't produce the same. Right now, I don't know how skyscrapers are being built or designed that's why for me it is beautiful. Or Pia Guanio, for example, is beautiful because I can't care for my body or my looks the same way as she can with herself.

EDA: It's funny how my classmates speak of beauty in terms of form and function. They say a building is beautiful because it's comfortable, secure, well-planned... when, in fact, beauty, in itself, is a separate component of architecture, and can be judged separately from form and function.


Haaaay, I just love being a teacher! Everyday, every class, every question asked, everything is a new lesson to be learned!

capt. backfire at 10:10 AM

Tuesday, November 16

The ACARE Weekend

I took the last flight out of Davao City, 7:40pm of November 11. Sheesh! Buying the plane ticket less than 2-hours before the flight is such a nerve-wracking experience. I left a lot of things. I spent a lot of money on cabs. I wasn't able to buy pasalubongs. So, I swear it won't happen again. Lex and I met up at SC and we walked to the UP Mindanao Guest House (where I will be staying for the next two days). Thank God Mang Mauro's home, else I'll probably grow more varicose veins waiting. Dumped my things, we headed for Philcoa CityMall to eat at Chowking and buy toiletries at Mercury. A lot of things have changed since the last time I went to that place. Shops were renovated. Gates were erected. More sidewalk fruit vendors are visible. Crowded, but at least it's lively. Anyway, when I went back to the house, Sir Tim was already there. I didn't chat with him much and immediately dropped out of exhaustion. Tomorrow is another day...

Friday, first day of ACARE. I curse UST for being so far and congested. In fact, I came in late for the conference because I can't get a ride. Entering Beato, I was greeted by a flock of beautiful people forcing me to register. "Ah Miss, your name please. Are you a student, visitor, guest? And from what school?"...

"Arch. XXXX . I am a presentor. I'm from Ateneo De Davao University. So I believe I'm already registered." ...Then complete silence. I can feel wide eyes staring at me with eyebrows raised up their foreheads. "Er, guys, Am I not supposed to sign anything? I think those papers need my signature." Then, they synchronizingly gave me the papers and the conference kit and directed me to the elevator. When I reached 3rd floor, I was trying to balance everything in my arms... the bag, the jacket, the kit, the pack of facial tissue ('coz by then, I was sweating profusely!). I was indirectly asking those cutey usher guys to help me, but it seems they are excited to help old and famous architects instead. A girl usher (i think she's just in her 3rd year) offered to carry my things and get my merienda for me. Thank God for students like her! This whole stereotyping thing is not really working for me. Not only because I'm young and obviously inexperienced about these matters, but also because I'm from a far-flung university.

Lex was already there. I saw a lot of familiar faces... Grace Ramos, Zeny Galingan, Gerard Lico, Dean Espina, Grace Edralin and Rowee and Boy from other arki schools in Davao. The concept of this conference still puzzles me. Good thing Lex simplified it for me... "Ang mang-tsugi ng study ng ibang tao". Gawd! I instantly remembered the skwakers powerpoint I made the day before. I need to revise it... bigtime! I spent the whole day thinking how to make my presentation more "convincing" and less tsugi-able. With my mind out of focus, it seemed all presentors for that day were speaking blah-blah... blurry noises of irrelevant stuff. We joined Alan for lunch that day and invited him to watch the rest of the afternoon presentation. Shucks, it feels good to be with two old buddies in that time of complete "ngarag-ness." Lex offered to burn and print my prepared powerpoint that night. And after 85 million years of (seemingly) endless revisions, i dined with some of my blockmates who are just around the UP area... Donna, Kitch and Lex (again!). We ate pizza and pasta at Napoli's somewhere in Timog.

Saturday, second and final day of ACARE. I know I really look constipated the whole morning. Who wouldn't be? I'm the first presentor of the day! I'll be sharing my panel of reactors with Arch. Dayan, who has finished a masters degree at UCLA Berkeley and has gazillion of accomplishments. My introduction is like a back cover synopsis of a book; while his is the whole book! Hahaha... I started presenting my paper. Through the whole presentation, I only thought of a single image -- the image of my History class in Ateneo Arki. It's my worst but favorite class since I started teaching. I guess it helped because I think I convinced the audience pretty well. I got comments, suggestions, praises, and more raised eyebrows. But what the hell?! I was there. I have my paper. I showed conviction. And I think that's enough. Kitch, Alan and Lex were there to give moral and immoral support. That moment was important to me and I'm glad I shared it with my friends. Later that evening, I met up with my high school bestfriend Jazzie at Greenbelt 3. We ate at Krokodile Grill and lounged around Seattle's Best. It was almost midnight when we parted. I bought two Gonuts Donuts as pasalubong for Sir Tim, who stayed late for two consecutive nights just waiting for me at the guest house.

The next day, I packed my things and said my good-byes to Sir Tim. That night, I'll be staying at Lex's house and will be spending the night with Lex, Alan and Naj. Lex and I spent the whole afternoon watching DVDs. I particularly liked "Mambo Italiano"; while my brain got twisted with the story plot of "Water Drops on Burning Rocks." We had dinner at Popeye's in Galleria with Ruthie, Naj, Alan, Vena and Fen, who all just got in from their review at CDEP. After dinner, we watched "Taxi." After the movie, we played billiards. And as if the night still doesn't want to retire, the four of us headed to Lex's house and continued chit-chatting about more personal stuff. Naj and I find ourselves talking about my "what if's" and "shouldn't have's" until I couldn't talk no more.

Lex cooked sardines pasta for breakfast (which really tasted good... and I hope he believes me this time!). I left the house just in time to make it to my return flight to Davao. I realized I wasn't able to buy any pasalubong for my sisters. So, I just picked some goodies at St. Cinnamon at the airport before I checked-in. I seated right next to a cutey chinito guy and thought of starting a conversation. But when he surprisingly pulled out a newspaper written in chinese characters, I knew my plans of making pa-cute will be pointless. hehehe... When I reached home, my sisters, not thinking of my weekend exhaustion, grabbed me to watch "House of Flying Daggers." Good thing the movie is really interesting and it made me forget that I'm drop-dead tired. Did I even surrender? I guess not! Because today I showed up for my 7:40am class and attended my UAP chapter's monthly meeting that ended around 9pm. Whew! This is the looongest weekend I had in years... and the looongest entry I wrote for this blog.

capt. backfire at 10:11 AM

Monday, November 15

On Terracotta Floor
(for the deepest and coolest person I know)

You remembered...
On terracotta floor
To forget we pretend
And act the story's end

Days passed
I turned the other way
In my silent gasping,
Tranquility
Numbness
I stood out in bleeding rain

Forgiveness, changes
Left us to decide
Unmask what is inside
And confide
The truth is confessed

I am warned
But not ready to face
Happiness and guilt
Self-inflicted harm and sadness

I cried inside this cubicle
I mourn for tomorrow
His hands I cannot turn
His fate with no miracles
I will learn
On terracotta floor
I remembered...

capt. backfire at 9:58 PM

Tuesday, November 9

Freedom of Speech

Punyeta!
Punyeta!
Punyeta!

... yan ang freedom of speech. hehehe

Seriously, I'm in the mood for saying Punyeta! to anyone. I mean, who will not be outraged?! ACARE will be this coming Friday and UST has not informed us of our schedule or if we are really included at all! If not for Lex, we would never know that we'll be presenting our paper on Saturday. Punyeta talaga! Now I have to cram my powerpoint presentation. Punyeta!

But looking at the bright sides....

I watched "The Incredibles." .... Incrediboy rocks!!! hehehe Astig!
I'll be with my college friends this weekend.
Free air fare. More miles!
School will start on Thursday (bright side ba 'to?)
Dytoc and Evang will be here on Friday!
MMC1 and Chocolate Parfait at Pancake House
46 days before Christmas in HK
and... Freedom of Speech!!!

capt. backfire at 1:05 PM

Monday, November 8

Bookwormoid



Help! I 'm turning into a book worm!!! leche! It's the Coelho book... I knew it! I just knew it! Now, I find myself visiting NBS almost everyday. I buy 1 book a day. And it's eating my savings big time!!! The only consolation to this addiction is that I get to earn more points with my NBS Laking National card, which by the way was never used for over a year.

Reading was never my hobby. My sister even told me that even if I want to pursue LLB studies and pass all the LAE in the Philippines, I can never survive law school because I don't like reading books. In high school and college, the only books I read were those assigned by teachers and the org's logbook. Hehehe... Basta yung may pictures or illustrations lang... the likes of Little Prince, manga/comics, or children's books lang. Now that I've started teaching, I only read books related to my lessons. Minsan, pahirapan pa! Hehehe I always thought the best stories are those that happen in real life, my life and the lives of people I know. Even magazines and newspapers are boring because television and movies are better representations of life.

But lately, I discovered fiction is not bad after all. I discovered Sun Tzu's Art of War can't have a single comprehensive interpretation on film. I discovered faces and scenes in my head brought by the stories I read is too large a production for Jerry Bruckheimer or even Pixar Animations. I discovered cookbooks are better than cooking shows because no one will tell you how good or bad the recipe taste and that can be such a surprise. It can be a frustration though because sometimes that brilliant idea I thought I had has already been published pala years ago. It's also frustrating to know that I've wasted so many years not reading and therefore I need to catch up with everyone.

I remember a few years back when my 7-year old sister showed me her borrower's card. Half a schoolyear pa lang, she's already in her 3rd card. And by the time she's in grade 6, she already finished reading almost all books in the elementary library and started reading high school books. No wonder she's so smart. If I just knew back then the rewards of reading...

Anyway, I'm off to NBS again. Bye.

capt. backfire at 2:29 PM

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