Meaning

I emailed my mom last week. i told her of my new plans and the decisions that go with it. in my email, i started to explain myself, justified everything. at the end of my monologue are the words, "i want to be successful this time." and then she replied...

"don't do things to be successful. do things because you wan't to do them, you want to learn from them, and because your life will be more meaningful if you do them. success will just come out of it."

amazing! it's like a line taken from an inspirational greeting card or something. that advice couldn't have come in a better time. my new mantra: MEANING.

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i just quit my teaching job at UP Mindanao. one third of my income gone just like that. i know it will affect me big time, not only financially but socially. i know my co-teachers there didn't expect it. i thought about it long and hard. and the decision is not something i wish to negotiate or explain further. i just hope this adds up to the "meaning" i'm looking for.

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for the first time in a very long time, my wishlist is empty. all i need to do is find meaning in everything that i have. after that... nirvana!