Stupid Mouth

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The name is Elaine or Ien or Pssst or Hoy ...or whatever suits you

...from the city of Davao

...26 with fine lines and wrinkles already

...short-haired, two-eyed na! (thanks to constact lenses), right-handed, flat-footed

...wants to be a Buddhist and a United Nations interpreter someday

...confused about life in general

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Tuesday, August 23

Tired

yes, i'm sooo tired. hindi naman ako tinatamad, pero pagod lang talaga ako. i've been staying as late as 3am this past few days. nakakainis nga kase that would mean higher electricity consumption. how perfect pa kase swak na swak sa krisis! no, i don't think i have insomnia (aha! first stage: denial!). i just have so many things to do. lessons, papers, applications, uap... y'know, stuff. i think i have this automatic response to commitments -- procrastinate then cram. haaaay, brings back college memories. hehehe hindi na ako nagbago. i always thought my late night (academic) activities will cease after graduation. di pala.

when i look at my schedule, parang hindi naman hectic eh. my activities are not even physical. i think it's just so extreme. pag walang ginagawa, wala talaga. pag meron, sagad na sagad. i also hate the fact that i've lost my "human touch" and i've mastered numbness. my motto now is "queber!" i'm too tired to show emotion and too tired to control it. basta, parang everything that comes out of my mouth is, " yeah, sure, whatever you want, fine, ok." no questions asked, i'll do it. too tired to even argue. at least there's one thing i'm not tired of - blogging. pero malapit na rin, nauubos na rin pasensya ko sa walang kabuhay-buhay na buhay ko.

tonight, i'll probably stay up late again. i just know it'll be a long night. my bio-clock tells me the morning has just begun. no, i don't need coffee to rouse me anymore. i don't need midnight snacks to sustain my energy. i'm too tired to contemplate on eating or drowsing. basta, habang sinisipag pa, gawa lang ng gawa. hayaan ko na lang na yung kapaguran ko ang magpatulog sa akin.

on a lighter note, good thing there's the "uplate" of pinoy big brother. nah, i'm not a hype victim. eh sa yun lang ang matinong mapapanood at that time. i'm not really into cable shows. mas gusto ko pinoy yung nagsasalita, parang may iba pang taong gising. hehehe ... not to mention, nakaka-irita ang hosting ni mariel which, actually, keeps me awake the whole time.

capt. backfire at 2:59 PM

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